Ted's Fat Shit

I remade Ted's Fat Shit, the audio file. Its about three time as long. It also includes his adventures after he gets out of the hospital.

We also have a new program for the Text to Speech conversion. It gives us more options. Plus annoying water mark is gone as well.

Interesting Side Note: Since John Hancock signed his name all big, Does that mean that another founding father couldn't sign? Fuck john Hancock then. He says that he signed big so that the queen of england could read it. I don't think thats it. I think he just wanted Delirious Jack out of the way of his global domination schemes. I was Delirious Jack.

Pass the blunt to the nigga on the left!

I have decided to expand on Ted's Fat Shit audio file. Seemed incomplete to me and my associate; JD, who will start making his own contributions (including revisions to this exact sentence, hey everybody!).Back to Sef- My writers block file will be uploaded tomorrow. And I just got another author.

Planning on posting the aristocrats file on youtube.

Molten Candle Wax

Keep in mind, any of my five listeners can comment with ideas and suggestions. I can change the audio files that are posted anytime.

My next audio files will be about random community projects and things along those lines. I will also make one about writers block eventually.

Keep in mind this is still a very small time blog. So help us bring some new listeners in if you can. Please? No? Alright. Alright! Damn I understand! No reason to get so fucking offended.

School and Compuer Related Sexual Innuendo

I posted Two more audio files. Find yourself a friend and listen to it with them. Now!

Aristocrats Is Done.

Its 33 minutes long and is best heard while looking at the script. Just plug the script into a word proccessor and it will be easier to follow. Tubular!

Good Luck with all the random joke scattered through out the Epic Joke.

New Audio File!

I just posted anouther audio file to the left there. Just have a kick back and listen to it if you would like to. Can't kick back? Then this probably isn't for you.

I took a thesaurus to the aristrocrats joke. Just going to post it some time today. Got sick of working on it to tell you the truth.

Psychedelic Idea

Ever see someone working really hard on something and they happen to pass and you hear them kinda talking to themselves? I mean physical labor and not that godless cubicle jobs. Anyway I think the reason they sorta whisper to themselves is a instinct that humans have to help them think. Let me explain.

What I mean by this fucking strange theory is that on a subconscious  level, everyone is whispering to themselves. Just when your panting for breathe its just a little more obvious. I think its to help assimilate the thought process in such a way to save energy. Remember hearing for the first time that people only use ten percent of their brain? This may be why or something like that.

Well try this. Try holding your breath and thinking of something. By holding your breath I mean, let no air in or out. Don't pass out! Anyway try thinking of a relatives name or solving a math problem or something. You can post in comments what happens. Keep in mind this is just a theory of mine.

Mulch?

Remember that ice storm that fucked up all of the trees in the central states? Well I helped someone get some branches out of their yard today. Anyway When we unloaded the branches at a kinda community branch dump place,  They were burning it. That struck me as a bit stupid.

I think we could make better use for that lumber. Like the bigger pieces could be sold for lumber or fireplaces or something like that. And the smaller pieces could be mulched up and sold to other states for spring planting or something. Damnit It may have provided some relief to some of the more screwed people out there.

O well It was just an observation I made today.

Cold Cuts

I bet some of you are wondering why we use the Speaking notepad program instead of just talking into a microphone like device. I am not very articulate. In fact some may say that I have a speech impediment. And to those people I say felch shit from your gay lover's eyes.

Anyway I decided to take a break from the aristocrats joke. I will probably write some type of fake product advertisement.

Over time I will also provide scripts so people can know exactly what I typed to get the program say the shit it says.

Updates

Alright I posted all the audio files there on the left. See it on the left there? I knew you would. Anyway they all start with an intro that we cant get rid of right now. So don't worry about it. Also CJ may not be able to post anything new.... ever!

I am working on an aristocrats joke right now. Never heard of them? Look it up on Google video or something. Anyway its up to 37 minutes long. I should be able to get it up to an hour long.

Possible other names for this Fucking Blog

Here is a list of proposed names for this blog:

1. Fresh Soup
2. Suck my Dick
3. We are not douche Bags
4. Midget Hammers
5. The exact name we already have
6. Demented Machinations
7. Your Phone is Ringing
8. Mr cold pants and his band of merry men
9. Lazy bones
10. Industrial Porn
11. Sponge
12. Cancer Causes Tobacco
13. Pirates who prevent Global Warming
14. Diced up prostitutes
15. Scripted Violence

We are going to start posting little Audio Files somehow Later